A Secret About Bullying No One Will Tell you

You’re still doing it!

You know what I’m talking about. You keep walking past when you see it happening. You avoid it because it looks messy and you don’t want that mess associated with you.

But, it’s still affecting you isn’t it?

You still get worried when you see it happen again on the news. Your stomach turns and you pray it doesn’t come to your school or happen to your child.

You have to sit through yet another meeting about it.

Why? You might ask yourself. This has nothing to do with me!

And that’s where you’re wrong.

You keep seeing or hearing about abuse, bullying or harassment happening again and again. And you still think it has nothing to do with you, but you’re wrong.

You see it on the news or social media and thank god it’s not happening to you or your child, but you’re wrong.

The it’s not my problem mentality will catch up with you.

And if you don’t believe me I can prove it to you. It’s only a matter of time before it becomes your problem too.

The blueprint you have been condoning isn’t working anymore.

What you allow will continue and eventually affect you or someone you care about. Maybe not in today, but sooner than later you will become affected in some way by the things you are allowing to happen to others.

This belief of separation simply doesn’t exist and will continue to worsen the longer you pretend it does.

Walking by an argument, ignoring a fight and looking away when a bully attacks their victim. None of this will keep you safe and I’ll tell you why.

The moment you hear or see something happen it becomes your problem.

You cannot hide from your responsibility to be a good person. The universe simply won’t allow it. What you allow and ignore will not only continue, it will grow exponentially.

Your right to be a good person will find you.

If you don’t want yourself or someone you care about to become a victims, if you’re tired of sitting through mandatory harrassment meetings at work, if you want to fall in love with someone without baggage or trauma, then stop ignoring the horrible things that are happening to “others.”

It’s time you demand that your college roommate stops getting girls blackout drunk. It’s time you prioritize time with your kids when you notice there is something a little off. It’s time you speak up when your employer mistreats an employee. It’s time that you intervene.

Eventually the things that are happening to strangers will catch up to you, as well as the people you love and care about.

Don’t believe me?

Go look at the statistics of sexual assaults. Research the bullying epidemic. Google the statistics of depression, anger and anxiety. These issues are growing, not shrinking because you are ignoring them. Everything is on the rise because everyone thinks it’s not their problem and that someone else will do something about it. It’s time to flatten the curve of violence by doing something.

As the statistics keep rising it’s only a matter of time before you or someone you love becomes one. Many of you already are…

Have you ever wondered what would happen if you stopped hiding from the responsibility to make a difference and embraced it?

You could set a new standard of treatment for other’s by what your presence in those situations endorsed.

Sometimes it’s easy to throw your hands up and claim innocence because you aren’t doing anything wrong yourself, but that is a crime in itself. It is a delusion.

If you see something, say something! Better yet do something.

You have no right to complain about anything ever again unless you are ready to take responsibility for the part you have played in contributing to the delusion that it’s not your fault and that someone else should do something.

The world is the way it is because too many of you are keeping the secrets. Too many of you are watching others do the dirty deeds and feeling like its not your karma, but it is.

The cure is so simple it is scary.

The only thing required of you is to create a ripple effect. You do not have to be a hero or intervene in a fist fight. Just do one thing different than what you would normally do. Something as simple as reaching out to the victim, or the bully for that matter, and expressing to them there is another way. That you see what is happening to them or what they are doing and letting them know they aren’t alone.

Start teaching others a new way. Learn a new way yourself. Teach them that they do not have to stay where they are at. Let them know they are not stuck in the frame of mind of the victim or the bully.

Little by little…

Correction by correction, you will create a world with less suffering. A statistic will drop that could have included you or someone you love.

You can show bullies how to get what it is that they are truly after. You can teach compassion and genuine concern for the bully. Show them that it takes more courage to face yourself than it does to face others. For this to end our empathy has to extend to both of the afflicted.

You can show victims that they are not stuck. That just because someone feels like doing something, doesn’t mean they have to sit there and take it. You can show them they aren’t alone, that there are people who care.

Before its too late again..

Remember to help everyone, not just yourself. There is a divine reason you see it happening and not someone else. It is part of your purpose and journey. Do not do yourself a disservice and walk away from your purpose. The experiences you are exposed to in your life are set in place strategically to lead you to your purpose. Do not ignore the calls. It will only cause you to suffer more. Ignoring these issues will allow them to grow. Please do not ignore them any longer. Throw love and compassion on them and put them out for good.

We are all connected and we help ourselves and those we love when we help our neighbors and strangers.

Treat everyone as if they can unlock better lives for us all because they absolutely will.

Remind others to take their judgments and turn them inwards. This is where all of our power truly lies. Hold up a mirror to the behaviors of others. Make them at least think twice before they do it again. This your ripple. This is your purpose.

We are here to teach and help one another. Not to simply exist and serve ourselves.

If we are each others problems and there is no separation, then we can be each others solutions as well. What you allow will continue. It will eventually catch up to you, so why not address it the first time you see it happen.

Let’s do more with our lives. Let’s choose to love, grow, teach and enrich the world instead.