6 Perspective Shifts you Need to Fix Any Problem

I know exactly what you want to hear.

It’s the same thing we all want to hear. Everyone wants a quick fix, a shortcut, a hack that is going to instantly solve their problems.

However, in your heart of hearts, you know that the idea of a quick fix doesn’t exist. Even though you know full and well you’re going to have to put in the effort to get the results you want, you still hope for an easy way out.

This is how addictions can be created. When you hold onto this idea that there will be a quick fix to your suffering, and that fix never comes, what do you do? You turn to something to numb the suffering instead. This is why it’s imperative you process and deal with things as they come, in a realistic way.

 I know you want to hear that the pain in your life will one day magically be gone if you just have patience. That the dreams you have will one day just fall into your lap. That time heals all wounds.

The truth is avoiding life is more painful than confronting it. The only way you can fix your life, is to face it.

I’m not going to tell you what you want to hear. I’m not going to say that you should always stay positive. That negativity is a bad thing and should be avoided at all costs. That is not my brand. Instead I’m going to be honest with you and tell you that your quick fixes will fail you.

Marrying a billionaire won’t ease your anxiety.

Dating an Instagram model won’t bring you confidence.

Getting the job of your dreams won’t make you happy.

Having the best parents in the world won’t prevent you from screwing up your life.

Whatever it is you are running from will catch you. You cannot escape the work. You cannot avoid the lessons.

The only way to fix your problems permanently, is to face yourself. You must go inwards.

You can spend your whole life wishing things were different. Trying to avoid pain and you will still find yourself suffering in one way or another.

True happiness is embracing the pain and learning the lessons.

The lessons you need to learn to become the person you are meant to be. Trying to avoid pain, or take the easy way out is not a solution, it is a procrastination that keeps you playing small.

The same lesson will continue will follow you through life until you choose to learn it. It will manifest in different forms and through different people. The same lesson will keep appearing until you listen to what it has to say. Repeatedly for eternity.

Save yourself the time and heartache of having to experience the same lesson more than once and just embrace it the first time.

The struggles put in your way are not an accident. They are specific to your unique brand of happiness and success. You are led to happiness and to your purpose when you face what you’re running from.

So, lean in.

Take notes on what is happening in your life right now. Figure out what it is you are running from. Then turn around and ask it what are you trying to teach me? 

Life isn’t easy. That is why, as a life coach, it is my purpose to dig deep and provide clarity to those who need it.

The point isn’t to make life easier, that would defeat the purpose of it. It is far more rewarding to prepare you to handle life instead.

If you’re ready to overcome your problems and live life with more clarity and control you can start now by incorporating these 6 perspectives shifts into your life.

Admit to your delusions

These are the stories you tell yourself when you turn away from reality to make yourself feel better. Learn to question your motives and goals. Are they realistic and productive or are you setting yourself up to fail? It is human nature to want to achieve things that you perceive will improve your life, while also trying to figure out the quickest, easiest way to get it. Everything we do is to get a result.

We all want perfect lives that require us to do the least amount of work. But this is a delusion. There has been and never will be an easy way out. Turning to something other than yourself for fulfillment or happiness is the quickest way to misery. Face your pain points so you can gain the insight you need to handle the next lesson and continue to move up the ladder of life.

 Life is inherently messy and difficult. The point of being human is to gain experiences and learn from them, with the end goal to make life a little easier in the future. Nothing and no one can get you what you truly want but yourself.

Every time you admit to your delusions, life does get a little easier. Notice I say a little easier. There will always be bumps and bruises. However, the more lessons you master, the easier life will become because you will gain more and more wisdom as you go. You will start to understand that it’s not the situation that defines your life, but how you choose to look at and move through it that does. Which brings me to the next point!

You must go through it, to get over it.

I know this one is a doozy. But you will be grateful for the struggle once you overcome it. You need to feel your tragedy and pain in order to get over it. When you avoid, you prolong the suffering.

Your body will naturally heal itself; it is your mind that prevents healing. Your ego specifically will tell you that you aren’t strong enough, but you are. You are divine and powerful, you can heal.

Allow yourself the compassion and space to heal. Make it a priority. There is nothing more important in life than healing yourself. Unhealed trauma causes even more of it.

It is painful to sit with your wounds and heal them, but it is worse to ignore them and bleed out. You may always have a mark, but the skin will always be tougher there and you will have learned something important. The kindest thing you can give yourself is time to process and heal your pain.  

Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional

Pain is a part of life that you cannot control. What you can control is the meaning you assign to your pain. And it’s that meaning that determines whether your pain causes you to suffer or not. The objective here is to engage in the pain to lessen the suffering.

If you are fighting with your partner you have a few choices. 1) You can play the victim and blame everything on your partner. 2) You can lash out, attack and take no accountability. 3) You can admit to your shortcomings and do better. Do this.

When you blame others or play the victim this will prolong your suffering. When you take control of your part in any given situation you are allowed insight to resolve your problems.

It may be painful to a engage with your pain, but when you do, you grow. Whether you realize it or not, you make the choice to avoid or engage your pain all the time, every day. So, become aware of it and choose to assign a meaning to your pain that is less painful.

Your beliefs will change, grow and evolve

Know that what you think and how you feel today can change tomorrow. Be open to the possibility for new ideas, solutions and blessings to come into your life. Do not be so miserable, stubborn and stuck that you have your head down when an opportunity presents itself.

When life gets hard be ready because something amazing is about to happen. Do not stay stuck in the same beliefs that got you into the mess you are in.

Be willing to learn something from your situation. In fact, go out of your way to willingly and deliberately change things about your life that no longer resonate with you or the person you want to become.

You are not entitled

Sorry I have to say it. Even if you’re tired of hearing it. I’m trying to get you out of your problem, not enable you to stay stuck!

Often, when we go through something tough in life, we feel like it’s not our fault and that we deserve more. Yes and no. Yes, of course you deserve an amazing life where all your dreams come true. But you’re going to have to go get it yourself. You are going to have to make the choice every day to either get closer to what you want or further away from it. If you want happiness, success or whatever it is that your heart desires, it’s your responsibility to create it. No one is going to come along and just hand it to you. (And if they do there’s going to be strings attached that you will not like.) You will need to work your butt off to find happiness and keep it.

It will be your choice how your life turns out. It is your responsibility and no one else to create a life you love for yourself.

Life is temporary

Anything, at any point in time, can be taken from you. You can marry a billionaire only for their fortune to be lost. You can date a model and still be insecure. You can get the job or promotion you’ve been praying for, only to go home and still be miserable. You can have the best childhood ever, only to become an addict.

Nothing is permanent and nothing is promised. This aspect of life is exactly what makes it so valuable. The impermanence of life is exactly what makes everything so amazing. If we lived forever, we wouldn’t care about anything or anyone. We wouldn’t value happiness, joy or success because there would always be more people, more time and more experiences. We would value nothing and still be miserable because of it.

The fact that life is temporary is why you must value one thing over another, you must make smart decisions because you do not have an eternity. You only have this one life. Make it one for the books.

There is one thing that can never be taken from you and that is yourself.

Become the person you want to be tomorrow, by making changes today. Become the person you are meant to be by not taking the shortcuts. Know that you cannot escape the work that is meant just for you. You cannot avoid the lessons because they are the answers to your prayers that are being sent to you to help you create the life you’ve asked for.

Life will make sure that you learn all the lessons you are supposed to, so embrace them and move through them with as much grace and speed as possible. Overcome your challenges, so that no matter what life throws your way you will have the experiences it takes to handle anything .

Do the hard things now so that your future self will thank you!

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